Empaths often are misunderstood as being weak, or victims of their kindness. Thatâs not the case at all. Empaths are strong, resilient individuals who are highly sensitive to the feelings and emotions of others. However, when narcissists enter the picture, âvictimsâ are exactly what empaths become if they donât know how to protect themselves and create boundaries.
Empaths want to heal the world, and canât stand to see someone in pain. Because of this, they are naturally drawn to the irreparably damaged narcissist and their tales of woe. But a narcissist doesnât want to heal- a narcissist wants to manipulate, belittle, and most of all, continue to be a narcissist.
Even though yes, most empaths are already aware that being in a relationship with a narcissist is an unhealthy decision, they might not know exactly what they are in for- until now.
Here Are 17 Things That Happen When An Empath Loves A Narcissist:
1. The narcissist creates a sense of comfort for the empath. An empath will feel a strong connection to the narcissist, even if he or she does nothing to reassure the empath that their feelings are correct.
2. Empaths love to love. They enjoy making one another feel âwholeâ again. But there is a problemâŚthe more love and care an empath give, the more powerful and in control a narcissist becomes.
3. The narcissist will make the empath feel like the relationship is going well, but what is really happening is the narcissist is seeking constant validation. They ask, âYou love me, right?â and swiftly turn any (and every) conversation into one about themselves.
4. After a while, the narcissist will begin to use âgaslightingâ tactics to make the empath feel enormous self-doubt. âI never said that”, âyouâre crazy”, and âyouâre imagining thingsâ are common phrases that start the rapid decline of an empathâs mental stability.
5. This creates a relationship of control for the narcissist. They leave the empath feeling reliant on them for everything – they begin to feel like no one else would want them.
6. All of these manipulation tactics and control mechanisms cause many empaths to experience severe depression and anxiety. This only furthers the empathâs belief that they âneedâ the narcissist in order to feel okay. They alienate themselves and the narcissist becomes their entire world.
7. Everything a narcissist says and does is a direct attack on your personal reality. They can take you from the joy and normality that you once had in your life, to a shadowy place where feelings of inadequacy and worthlessness are daily occurrences because everything you do is wrong.
8. At some stage in the relationship, the empath will reach their breaking point. The person they once were becomes someone else, and their friends and family no longer recognize them.
9. Conflict in the relationship arises between the empath and the narcissist because the empath starts to take on the traits of their partner. Eventually, they begin to realize that their emotional needs are not being met, and display actions that say âmy needs matter too”. The narcissist sees this as selfish behavior.
10. What neither members of the relationship realize, is that even after it ends (which it will), both parties continue to suffer. The narcissist will continue on to other, equally toxic relationships, and pursue various avenues in their life – but they will still be miserable.
11. The empath will continue experiencing the abuse from a narcissist because it works like a poison in their mind and body. It enters every cell with one purpose- to destroy the reality of their target.
12. After the relationship falls apart, the empath looks to them as the problem. Surely it is their fault, they must have failed in some way. All of the narcissistâs toxic words come back to haunt the empath, and they think, âMaybe I was selfish for thinking about my own needs.â
13. However, the empath doesnât realize something very important – there is nothing wrong with them, and they didnât âfailâ anything or anyone. In fact, there is something very right with them. They were simply manipulated, used, and lied to by someone who had no remorse about hurting the another individual.
14. This begins the empath’s powerful transformation. It is a painful process, but so is being with a narcissist. They begin to understand that in order to grow, they must re-evaluate their âhealingâ process. Everyone is worthy of love, but not everyone is deserving of trust.
15. The empath will heal. It takes a realization that, they too, were broken and damaged, like the narcissist, but they are willing to recognize that. Whereas, the narcissist simply refuses to believe that they could possibly be flawed or in need of anything (or anyone).
16. The narcissist will carry on, looking for their next victim, completely unaware that their unhappiness is caused by themselves.
17. The empath will grow from this experience and recognize that there are parts of themselves they must protect, and balance if they are to live a wiser, more enriched life.
Originally published in UniSoul Theory
